Someone here really likes their porn huh?

I'm sorry for this tacky image. I'm mean that sincerely, I take no pleasure in presenting the objectification of body parts. For me, this is the way civilization ends, it's no different from deliberately pissing in one's bed, it's a sign one simply no longer cares for any kind of propriety.

The world will keep spinning on it's axis, money will remain the go card to life; but it ain't civilization.

So why present it? Well, some pleasant genius has decided, notwithstanding my fequent polite and not so polite appeals not to do so, to nominate me as a candidate for that lame arsed Best of Twitter again. This would be the 6th time now? I think so.


In order to facilitate my speedy removal from said wall, I assume these porn avatars and it gets me off quick (off the wall that is).

So it seems that some "Anipal" rather likes their porn, they keep putting me back again! Well, there's no accounting for taste huh?

I want to make a point about the whole Anipal thing before I continue. I've been critcised for 'not being nice about "Anipals" well, here is my response:


The tweeps behind animal avatars are not "Anipals" they are people, a microcosm of society with all of it's inseparable elements of good, bad, and ugly. People should grow up and understand this. Just because someone sticks an animal on their avatar doesn't make 'em a "pal" by a long shot. No Sir. Haven't I've learnt that the hard way...

I've been close friends here with tweeps since the day I started tweeting. I love my friends so it's not as though I see you all as "Stuffed animals" which is how someone I've since blocked rather offensively described you all to me on DM.

To be quite honest with you, I've never once critcized you all en masse. I like most of you far too much to do that. I've never once turned up on anyone's dms bitching about this tweep or that. But I know plenty who have.

Of course I've let off steam on dm about certain tweeps who have gone out of their way to hurt me. I don't feel bad about this at all. But the fact remains, I've never once turned up apropos of nothing and bitched about anyone here. I'd defy anyone here to say with any honesty that they know me to have done this. I rarely intiate DM conversations (or even timeline conversations for that matter) and when I do, it ain't about any of you.

I spend alot of time on DM with many friends, especially Sir Bailey. What do we talk about? Not any of you. We talk about drugs, swap filthy jokes and get high as fucking kites. I adore him. He is the best company.

Ok that's explained. Next thing: Why I wonder, do tweeps keep putting me back up on Best of Twitter? everyone knows I don't want to be there. So why? I'm not even angry about it. I've given it some thought, and I've realised they do this to me for the following reasons:

1. They feel competitive with me, in their dull little brains, they see me as the man "to beat" the one who makes them feel small, so they have to even the score somehow.

2. They are desperate for my attention, I no longer speak to any of them, and their egos cannot take this.

3. They are retards, rude, obnoxious, barely educated, and spiteful. They want to be me, I've noticed pathetic lame attempts at being Fudge clones.
Look, be yourself. I dont' want to be any of you, I dont' feel competitive with any of you in the least. The two major feelings I have toward you is esteem and an affection that overwhelms me and makes me shy at times or utter loathing toward those who have no fucking respect for me, for others or for themselves.

I want you all to remember one thing. I didn't want to be in the last competition, I appealed several times to faxo to take me off. I don't like attention. I didn't want to be there, I didn't want to beat anyone. But if tweeps are going to be nasty to me, well, they get the humliating drubbing they deserve. I have no conscience about that. Fuck them.


I want you to know that I'm not angry about being put back again, more just, "oh you sad, lame fucks".

I do despise all competitions of this nature, and I'm sick to death of tweeps who justify all their crass bullshit by saying "Oh, it's for a good cause" just saying something is for charity doesn't mean it isn't egotistical bullshit, nor does it confer any kind of credibility or class up on your lame brained crap.

One final thing, the utter moron (I know who he is) who put me back in last month's competition did his zombie dog friend no favours at all. As if he wanted all this shit splattering all over the place again. To be quite honest with you, I feel sorry for the poor bastard, but then again with friends like his, who needs enemies? It's why I've blocked them all. That little group is just trouble making scum who have all bitched about eachother to me on dm at one time or other.

What else can I say to you? Not much, I think I've explained everything I wanted to.

I have a horrible headache, I'm getting some kind of flu again I'm certain of it. I'm so cold. Ah well, shit happens.

Love and Cheers

Sir Fudge Esq

(ever proudly, your Motha Fucka)