In lieu of a decent post, due to my accident, I'm going to publish the first 3 parts of an interview Sam The Poodle sent me to complete a week or so ago.
The questions, as you will see, Dear Reader, are psychological in nature. Sam is clearly interested in the contents of my mind (fuck knows why). If you persevere reading future installments, you'll see that in my usual inimitable style, I was brutally honest in my responses. The result was, the interview makes me look like a depressive, suicidal psychopath. But hey, they were Sam's fucking questions, I noticed not one of them asked me to list my good points, and very few gave me any opportunity to reveal a nicer side to my nature, the bastard. I'd like you Dear Reader, to keep this in mind if you read the entire interview that I'll post over the coming days as I try to recover from my overdose er I mean my "accident" such as it was.
Enjoy!
Sir Fudge Esq
As a brash young upstart,he stretched the limits of Twitter etiquette, in this month’s edition of Vanity Fair he muses on everything from Twitter to his substance abuse issues. As told to Sam The Poodle
1.What is your current state of mind?
My current state of mind can’t be adequately conveyed in words. But I’ll try to at least approximate it for you. It is a state of permanent alarm; my mind is a paranoid entity that resists any attempt at colonisation of its interior. The first thing an intruder into my headspace would see is a sign in red that clearly reads “You are trespassing. You are unwelcome. Fuck Off”
It’s quite simply my own private headspace. No one, not even God may enter.
2. Which living person do you most admire?
To be quite honest with you, my misanthropy precludes me from unconditionally admiring anyone. I can’t really provide any loving gush for you. I do in an oblique way, admire my Cunta Kinta. Her behaviour is disgusting. But her mind is a pure force of nature, it is sincerely, beyond good or evil, her mind simply operates in a completely unselfconscious, un-self reflective way. She has absolutely no conscience. She is quite a brilliant, magnetic personality, next to her, everyone around her seems dull, I’m not kidding. There is no one quite like my Cunta. And I don’t think there ever will be again.
3. What is your greatest fear?
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Ok, so far, not so terrible, the rest is...well, I hesitate to publish it. But no one's forcing you to read it either.
See you tomorrow.