Hey All, Best Read This First:
Greetings and a warm welcome to my blog.
First things first
This blog contains words and references offensive to those who never made it through the maturation process.
The intellectually and psychologically impaired will find nothing here to enjoy.
If this applies to you, dear reader, you're welcome, and strongly encouraged to leave now. No hard feelings on my part.
I'm trying to make this clear to the 'boo hoo brigade". If you CANNOT grasp this simple concept. This page is NOT FOR YOU
REPEAT: WARNING: BLACK IRONY. NASTY SELF PISS TAKING HUMOUR. FUCK OFF NOW IF YOU CANNOT UNDERSTAND THIS. I WON'T MIND. EVER.
*PS: I'm pro Palestinian, pro animal rights in a way that pisses many people off. You should consider fucking off now if you object to this kind of thing.
PS This blog is not really fit for human consumption, it's best read as it was written, drunk on vodka or otherwise high as a kite...Enjoy...
Hello, I hope all is ok with you, I have missed chatting to you, truly. Especially to the twit who persistently suggests I'm deranged, come back, honey, you make me feel so...uh 'superior', is the word I think.
Well, enough of that. I've had some friends tell me they are a little annoyed with the amount of "Go vote" tweets I've been sending. Well, I agree, it is annoying and I try to keep it to a minimum. I sincerely apologize, I know how irritating it is, it's how I used to feel about pawcircles, they spammed up the page and made it look like a fucking morgue. Was so depressing, at the height of this pointless faddish bullshit there were paw circles for fucking blisters for Christ sakes.
Someone who I like very much asked me on DM what the fuck I was doing in the the competition in the first place. Well that, along with the aforementioned apology, is the purpose of this post, it's actually quite a funny story, so listen and be attentive:
Regular readers of this blog will recall that I was rather irate when I found out I'd been nominated as a candidate for that piece of crap. What I then did, was contact the management at faxo and explain to them, that a popularity contest just isn't my thing, and was there any possibility of removing me from it?
Very kindly, they granted me my request. I was ever so happy. As far as I was concerened that was the end of the matter.
Well, there's no accounting for idiots. I think some moron who read my previous post on this blog thought it would be rather funny (which gives you some idea of the low brow mentality of these dickheads)to resubmit my name.
Again, I contacted faxo management, I sent them several emails, several tweets, several dms. I heard nothing back. So I thought, "ok, ok, you fucking wanker you want me as a candidate? I'll give you something to vote for", and I came up with my present (glorious) avatar. I'm very proud of it. It's my favourite avatar ever.
A week or so went by, and I was on that fucking wall, I honestly thought no one was going to vote for a Motha Fucka.
I finally received a DM from faxo apologizing and explaining that they were snowed under with work etc etc, they also asked me did I still want to be taken off because my votes were just rolling in. I was surprised.
I replied, "you know what? I find it hysterically funny that people are voting for a Motha Fucka, leave me there it's cool".
I recieved the following response: "You're a nut....that's why we love ya". It's so nice to be understood.
Now I'm happy to get in everyone's face with my Motha Fucka avatar. And what's even nicer, is waving bye bye to people who, entirely unprovoked, have been cunts to me as I pass them by... Oh, God it feels so good.
In terms of my candidacy, I have no expectation of winning or even being in the top 25, I'm simply happy to laugh that people seem enjoy voting for a motha fucka, it makes me laugh and laugh...everyone else is trying to look appealing and, well, then there's me... I'm so getting off on myself.
But you know, if I saw someone who proudly stated they were a White Trash Motha Fucka, I'd vote for them before I voted for some mealy mouthed slimey cunt who packages themselves as everyone's friend, then bitches about them behind their backs.
I think though, I'll bow out shortly, as the song goes: "I've had my fun, and now it's done" I'm a bit embarrassed to ask faxo to withdraw me again, so I'll have to think about what to do.
If anyone is appalled by my avatar, just remember, I never asked to be on the fucking thing in the first place. All I can say is: Deal with it kiddies.
PS: to those who are annoyed by my spam, I honestly am sorry and there's no hard feelings on my part if you unfollow, if you want to come back when it's all over, that's cool.
Bye for now
Sir Fudge Esq (Motha Fucka Extraordinaire)
Posted by Sir Arran Fudge - Bailey at 1:43 AM
ершы щту шы ащк фдд еру MOTHERFUCKERS црщ сщьздфшт фищге цшуреук Ш зщые шт Утпдшыр щк fucking Пукьфтб FUCK YOU. Дуфкт фтщерук агслштп дфтпгфпу ша нщг вщтэе fucking дшлу ше Нщг руфк?
Вщ Ш сщьу щт нщгк fucked up boring as cunt shit идщпды фтв сщьздфшт фищге црфе еру fucking идщи фищге? Щтсу? Умук? Nyet Ш fucking вщтэе
Лууз ыгслштп Obama's cock нщг fucking white trash нщг ьшпре дуфкт ыщьуерштпб...зкщифидн тще фтнщту црщ сщьздфшты фищге еру дфтпгфпу црщ сьздфшты фищге ф дфтпгфпу ерфе фтщерук идщп шы цшкееут шт сфт огые FUCK OFF.
Ершы шы цщклштп мукн цудд ащк ьу Ш'ь пщштп ещ вщ ершы ьщку щаеут, just to be a cunt, just to get up your fucking nose.
Агсл ершы шы ыщ дшиукфештп! Црн еру fuck вшвтэе Ш ерштл ща ершы иуащку?
Ш аууд ыщ Fucking Hot!
Щр,ыщьуершьуы даау шы fucking good
Дщтп дшму Кгыышф Дщтп дшму Сщььгтшыь! Ащк еру Утпдшыр ызуфлштп Цуые: Eat Shit and Die Fuckers
With Love (Mit Liebe)
Sir Fudge Esq. x
Posted by Sir Arran Fudge - Bailey at 10:34 AM
Did you miss me? Of course you fucken' did. Everyone loves their psycho bitch Fudgey Wudgey. I know, I know...
I took myself off that lame arsed shit for brains Best of Twitter thing, who the fuck takes that nut job ego bullshit seriously? I fucking cringed when I found I was on it. Poor @SamthePoodle really copped it, I thought he put me on it and I called the poor bastard a Son of a bitch, he still is a Son ofa bitch, but he was entirely innocent in this case. Poor Cunt.
I'm very grateful for those who voted nonetheless. Thank you, it's very kind of you to think of me, but popularity contests simply aren't me, I'm just not into begging for people to like me. Fuck that.
This is just a short post to say hi, and cheers guys, it's nice to see you again. x Amen
Posted by Sir Fudge Esq at 10:29 PM